Blogging for Beginners

I've convinced myself that autobiographical narratives are the bane of my existence, forever mocking my lack of storytelling imagination. Who can make themselves sound interesting? Only a narcissist! With that said, I'll begin my totally self-absorbed and mundane musings about my fairly trivial life as a twenty-something in this gigantic city (New York, that is).

After a long day of coffee consumption, writing, and exchanging some of the cheesiest jokes known to man with my boss, I came home with the intent to accomplish some really important shit. Was important shit accomplished? I know, you think I'm going to follow this train of thought into procrastination and inefficacy. But, shit WAS accomplished! Prelude phone call to set up Time Warner Cable Roadrunner Internet in new apartment, check! Completion of several job applications, check! Watching The Bachelorette reunion special as I complete job applications, check! (Come on, Roberto is SO hot, she'd be an idiot to pick the weird-Cape-Cod-guy-with-annoying-New-England-accent over him) Fix up LinkedIn profile, check! Call furniture store to confirm new bed delivery in new apartment, check! Watch The Real L Word online, check!

Speaking of The Real L Word, six episodes in, this lesbian reality (lesbiality?) series has me cursing the day I realized I was into the not-so-fair sex. It also has me cursing the day my parents' separate DNA collided to mold me with all my imperfections. Seriously, did they HAVE to pick all the gorgeous lesbians in Los Angeles and throw them into one televised, Top Model orgy? Thanks Showtime. I wonder how many straight men are watching this - because they should be glued to their couches with a bowl of popcorn. The amount of action these glamazons get makes Jenna Jameson look like the preacher's daughter.

Maybe the grass is always greener on the other side, but something tells me that women do understand each other better than two members of the opposite sex. Case in point, Jill and Nikki. Two sexy Jewish mamacitas who call softly objecting "an argument." Really, girlfriend. I wish all arguments looked like that.

Anyway, more Real L Word relationship analysis to come soon, I'm sure. Stay tuned. It's bedtime for this glama-lesbian (glamsbian?) wannabe.